Archive for April, 2011

“Sarah Palin: Produce YOUR Academic Papers” Crooks and Liars Challenges
April 28, 2011

After the President spoiled her little snark party, Mrs Palin went off on another tangent:

What the heck is wrong with asking the President of the United States to disclose what his college thesis was, what some of the um, uh, Harvard Law Review papers were that he wrote? I don’t care about his grades. I don’t care if he was a C student, more power to the C student.

What I care about is what goes into his thinking today, what is his foundation? From his background, a lot of that could be reflected in the writings he produced as a college and a grad student.

Mrs Palin can easily find an awful lot of the “um, uh, Harvard Law Review papers” written by the President, though probably only in libraries where books about gay people are not banned. Heck, she can pay someone to read it for her, if the only thing she can read is a signed $100,000 check.

In my view, Mrs Palin has nil interest in whatever the President contributed to the Harvard Law Review. He’s half-black, you know.

karoli, of Crooks and Liars, has an academic challenge of her own for Mrs Palin, who famously tried out many and varied institutions of higher education until she presumably found one that would give her a diploma (if, indeed, she has one). karoli writes:

Here’s my simple challenge, Sarah. You attended four universities in six years, before finally managing to eke out a degree from the University of Idaho in journalism. Over that fine university career, did you write anything? If so, would you be kind enough to produce it?

And let’s say you can’t really produce any documents you wrote when you were in college. Let’s talk about the tens of thousands you’ve spent on ‘advisors’ to assist you with your knowledge of foreign affairs, your messaging, and your strategies. Let’s see.

There’s the right-wing journalist Joshua Livestro, who you pay $4,000/month. What does he add to your thinking, your views? Is his background your background?

How about Orion Strategies, who you pay $10,000 per month for “issue consulting”? What, exactly, does Randy Scheunemann contribute to your thinking for that 120K per year salary?

Then there’s the matter of the $10,000 per month retainer your PAC pays North Star Strategies to ghostwrite your Facebook posts? Certainly you wouldn’t have a Bill Ayers of your own would you?

You know, for the $59,500 per month you shell out to consultants like those I’ve named, you must be getting a hell of an education. That’s pricier than Harvard, and you didn’t even have to avail yourself of affirmative action to get in on the action. Plus, it’s all paid for by taxpayers!!! Wow, Sarah, that’s a real deal.

So what the heck is the matter with me asking you, Sarah Palin, to satisfy my ordinary-person curiosity about what you’re learning from all these highly-compensated consultants? How do these people shape your views?

Will Jesus Palin Rise from the Dead?
April 21, 2011

This lady knows her stuff. She’s studied the bible and she knows that Jesus Palin will come …. AGAIN.

The Sarah Palin Cult followers write often and fondly about her favorable comparison with that other Jesus, you know the one, dirty librul from Muslinland.

Hark! I hear a Lamb of Sarah bleating now….

“That Sarah Palin has, through the power of the indwelling Holy Spirit a heart filled with great joy, perseverance, is charismatic, vibrant and effective, has spiritual gifts and leads a Christian life is obvious for all who look at her and hear her words through an unbiased eye and ear.

The answer to the question about Palin’s possible political future lies with the definition of the ”mission” that she has been empowered by the indwelling Spirit to undertake.

The mission could be to so impress multitudes by her Christian walk, her pro-life beliefs, her dedication to home and hearth, to family, to the poor, to moral values and to the betterment of mankind, that she leads people to Christ. If she never tries for or achieves elective office at any level ever again, but through her empowered mission changes untold thousands of lives for the better, than of her it would be said “well done thy good and faithful servant”.

Jesus Palin’s patriots constantly bemoan her persecution at the hands of the unbelieving lamestream media and predict she will be crucified in a series of tell-all books coming out in the very near future …. she bears her terrible cross for us, sob ….

“The woman who stands before you isn’t what she claims to be.

She’s even had the nerve to criticize us Pharisees. We are the MEDIA, the righteous of the land. She slandered us and blasphemed our gods. We will not let her stand.

We are the one true oracle of the age. Who is this plebian fishmonger to say what is and what is not? We have commanded her to be silent. Why does she disobey?

Not a bribe she will take, nor to Caesar will she bow. So we took her to the COURIC, and now she stands condemned.

Hear all you Pharisees. Hear all you praetorians. Here the judgment of the COURIC. Bribe the false witnesses. Slander her children and friends. Take what little she has. Cheat, accuse, and lie until all the fools who sing her song believe she is false and wrong…

What is truth? Pontius Pilate, quoted in John 18:38”

UrantiaSojourn.com

But it’s not only her radical fundamentalist Christianist cult members who worship Jesus Palin; godless heathens are welcome to get in on the worship action, too:

“As long as the planets orbit our sun, we will revolve around our Sarah. We vow never to be broken off from her “pull” and become lost in the political outer space because we have come to love the power and brilliance of our sun that is Sarah.”

Our Sun making the grass grow in Alaska

Jesus Palin is so worshiped and adored that that other Jesus (the brown-skinned hippie, you know the one) might be expected to attend a church service in praise of her today – if he were even admitted, that is.

Palin herself hasn’t stepped foot in a church for many years, except for publicity.

After a fire at their local church, the Palins hurry to get there before the TV cameras leave

Perhaps this is the reason she avoids actual church services.

Watch, as a visiting pastor from darkest Africa (yeah, the country) offers his prayers to protect Mrs Palin from voodoo in Wasilla, making sure she never again has to carry a shrunken head in case some thankless Alaskan casts an evil spell on her in the supermarket car park.

And why would Our Jesus Sun Palin stir herself to go to church, anyway? She doesn’t need to fake going to church any more, she gets $100,000 a throw to talk about religion instead of practicing it – which suits her just fine. All she has to do is decorate herself with gaudy Jesus jewelry (like her hilarious Vajazzle for Jesus) and even the media will swallow her Christianism.

Sarah Palin has a fake symbol for any occasion:

* a disabled baby to wave around like the Lion King to demonstrate her faux “motherhood” (along with a ridiculous story about how he sprung from her very own loins);
* flags and trashy flag trinkets distributed thickly about her home, office and person proclaim her fake “patriotism” – when, in reality, she has no respect for the US Flag at all, given she frequently and unrepentantly trashes it, according to the US Flag Code

* Blue Stars wherever she can insert them (so you can’t possibly miss them) inspire her to claim herself the mother of a “combat” vet (unfortunately for Mrs Palin, the Army doesn’t class chauffeuring the Top Brass around as “combat” – but she is certain not to let that stop her bullshit).

The Schvitzer of Wasilla

But Sarah Jesus Palin’s most egregious co-opting of symbolism to which she is not entitled is her wearing of the Star of David in an awkward effort to persuade the brain-dead that she really is the second coming of Queen Esther. And that’s not even the worst thing she’s done to the Jews.

She loves to “refudiate” ‘peaceful Muslims’ every chance she gets, but if the day ever comes when they can be of benefit to her then expect her to be all over their symbolism, claiming she’s always had the utmost respect for the Queen of England, or whatever she thinks sounds convincing.

But- wait! Could Sarah Palin also be Mary the Virgin Mother? This desperate fan freak thinks so:

“Beautiful and true and veritable mother, O Sarah of Alaska …she is a mom of moms in so many ways, so many senses … Track, Bristol, Willow, Piper, and Trig, her five wonderful kids–and she is now a grandmother too …but beyond her own family, think and reflect for a moment on where we stood on 28 August, 2008, the night of barack hussein obama’s DNC acceptance speech: There seemed to be no hope for a counterforce to the juggernaut of the Left and its “anointed” “messiah” … then, then, on the brilliant dawning of the morrow, in the town of Dayton, Ohio, a young mom stepped out of the shadows and into the Heart of America forever … ever since Sarah Palin Day, 29 August, ’08, think of the hopes, the dreams, the resolves, the courage, the joy, the light, the determination, the unquenchable martial and fighting spirit, the LOVE that she has brought forth, has engendered, has “procreated” in so many millions upon millions upon millions of hearts–young hearts, old hearts, Democrat hearts, Republican hearts, Independent hearts, Northern hearts, Southern hearts, Eastern hearts, Western hearts … AMERICAN HEARTS …then there are the delightful and pointed and neat neologisms and turns of phrase she has brought forth into the mind and vocabulary and lexicon of America, such as “refudiate” and “death panels” … then there are the new and courageous paths of political courage she has blazed and brought to birth: The fearless lady who never, ever retreats nor surrenders, but does strategically RELOAD, to fight again on another day … we are witnesses right now, perhaps, to a new way of running for the Presidency, initiated and brought forth by Sarah … but whether she becomes POTUS in 2012/2013 or later, just as George Washington of Virginia is the Father of His Country, so Sarah Palin, Mom From Alaska, will forever be the Mother of Her Country!!!!”

All of the above vomit-inducing worship has been lifted directly from the racist hate blog dedicated to Sarah Palin, Conservatives4Palin.

Bristol Palin™ Still Finding New Ways to Make Money from Tripp Johnston
April 16, 2011

A nice picture of a notorious young mother with her only achievement, you might say. Some may disagree, claiming that being third best on Dancing With the Stars was an achievement, but the Cult of Palin was responsible for that, not Miss Palin’s consistently low-scoring lolloping, writhing and nose-banging.

Horizontal folk-dancing?

There’s a very odd thing about Miss Palin’s book cover photograph, though: it’s old. Mommy’s little money-maker was only 16 months old when this photo was taken a year ago for a lucrative glossy haute couture magazine spread that his hard-working mother slaved over. By the time the book is published this picture will have been taken more than half his lifetime ago.

Children grow and develop so quickly, so why would Miss Palin choose an old baby photo for a book that’s supposed to be about her “journey“?

The last time Tripp was photographed for public consumption, shortly after his second birthday in December, his golden baby curls were already just a memory and he was eating fast food. Clearly, he wasn’t a baby any longer.

Tripp enjoys a snack; Mommy hides her freshly-implanted chin

But, business is business – and Bristol Palin’s business has only one asset.

“Let’s put an “iconic representation” of a mother and b-a-b-y on the book cover! Sales will double! Babies sell!”

After calling him a “mistake”, taking big money to complain about how difficult he makes life for her and publicly calling his father ugly names – not to mention trying to change his name – Bristol Palin further dishonors her child for money. Nice going, Mommy.

Sarah Palin Cult Show How They Scammed TIME Magazine’s “100 Most Influential” Poll
April 15, 2011

Sarah Palin’s former right-hand man Frank Bailey tells in his forthcoming book of the Palin administration’s habit of scamming media polls. Palin buddy and endorsement, disgraced US Senate candidate Joe Miller, was fired for using work colleagues’ computers to scam a poll on his own website (and lying about it). It’s not a stretch to figure that the Palin Cult has the full support of Mrs Jesus Palin, only daughter of God, in their nasty endeavors.

IsraeliCojones [Moderator] 4 hours ago
Repost from other threads: About the TIME 100 poll:

– Sarah was at 155 yesterday;
– She’s at 47 now, hence she gained 108 places in 24 hrs;

BHO is at 45, and she’s 230 votes away from beating him. You can do it, Palinistas.

Please also note that some haters also drive up her negatives, so keep it up until the poll is closed.

A few tip to optimize the vote:

Tip 1

– erase the time.com cookies
– put http://www.time.com in the “Exceptions” (don’t accept cookies from this site)
– after that you can revote by just refreshing the page. 😉

Tip 2

Bookmark the link in your personal bar, so that it is immediately accessible, and then open it in several tabs in Firefox or IE. You will then vote more rapidly.

Tip 3

For Firefox:

– to navigate through tabs: Ctrl + Tab
– to close a tab: Ctrl + W

Tip 4

When typing the crappy string before submitting your vote:

– don’t take accents, capital letters, bizarre signs or punctuation (.;? etc) into account: the string is valid even if you exclusively write in lower case letters without anything else (except space maybe, I haven’t tested this one).

– refresh the string for another one (circled arrows) if you can’t read it.

Direct link:

http://www.time.com/time/specials/packages/article/0,28804,2058044_2060338_2060292,00.html

——

IsraeliCojones [Moderator] Yesterday 09:01 PM in reply to Right_Wingnut
The tips I have given are fairly efficient to optimize the vote:

– first I open 10 tabs;
– I wait for all the pages to load;
– I click on yes on the first then go to the second etc (Ctrl+Tab)
– then i come back to the first and type the string + submit
– when I’m done, I type Ctrl+W until all tabs are closed.

Hence, I can vote 10 times in 1 minute or so.

Unfortunately, I have to go to sleep (it’s 4:00 am here), but if 10 guys would do as I say during half an hour, well, she would surge 😉